Distorted Memories, Occluded Vision

If the dead could roll over in their graves, I’m sure Nelson Mandela would have done a 720-degree turn by now. Once again, humans besotted with strenuous explanations and the Mandela Effect come to haunt us with more fallible memories. This article—published in the New Statesman just before Christmas—outlines some of the cries Redditors had about a movie called Kazaam, starring Shaquille O’Neal. (Anyone who saw the move can understand why one’s memory would be garbled beyond recognition.)

It turns out that many Redditors erroneously recall Sinbad—instead of Shaq—starring in a film called Shazaam, following the same premise and storyline the real movie Kazaam took. One crackpot, Carl (not his real name), was so certain Shazaam was real that he offered a $1,000 reward to the person who could present him a copy of his beloved childhood film.

“I was dumbfounded to see that there was no evidence of the movie ever being made,” says Carl. “I quickly searched the internet, scouring every way I know how to search, crafting Boolean strings into Google, doing insite: searches, and nothing. Not a damn thing.”

Alas, in the absence of evidence, Carl persisted in his erroneous belief and insists on a “timeline shift.” Perhaps Carl has been dwelling too much on the Flashpoint Paradox. Another person—one approaching the outer margins of reality—believes that the “film was recalled and destroyed.” There are plenty of movies which qualify for recall, if not incineration. But who would undertake such a strenuous effort? Of all the copies?

[Insert exasperated sigh]

It’s such anemic beliefs which prevent us from embracing the new year and thoughtfully approaching the horizon. 2017 is off to a great start, no?

Thankfully, one subreddit is devoted to debunking “evidence” adduced in favor of the Mandela Effect, claiming that such detritus is “clogging up the sub” rather than combating this nuisance on principle alone. However, I fear the other subreddits where Redditors can share their personal Mandela Effect experiences portends a recrudescence of conspiracy theories generally—in the media and elsewhere. And I’m fairly certain we could all do with fewer of those.

When will we stop perpetuating these false memories and face the fact that our memories just suck?